Being a stay at home mom is not as easy as sounds. it is very important to use some stretgey or effective tips to be a happy and productive stay at home mom.
Did you know, According to a research done recently, it has been observed that stay at home moms are way more stressed than the moms who are working outside the home. This constant stress putting a toll on their mental and physical health.
Another study conducted in the year 2012, University of Akron Researchers Adrianne French and Sarah damask discovered that full time working moms had been reported better mental and physical health.
And in this article, I will be sharing a few effective tips to be happy and productive as a stay at home mom.
It is true that being a stay at home mom is not as easy as seems. It could be quite chaotic and incredibly stressful. It is demanding, never-ending, exhausting and sometimes frustrating too. And I can understand all these emotions so well.
In fact, it is quite disturbing when people do think that you are wasting your precious lifetime by staying at home, and you are not contributing to our society.
Even some people say like “what do you do at home, the whole day?”
This is one of the most common scenarios for most of the stay at home moms, and because of this they often suffer from depression, anxiety, unhappiness and sadness.
Here are a few key reasons why moms stay at home is overstressed and not happy with their life.
Same sequence of routine tasks that seems never ending
Yes! This is one of the most prominent reasons of stress for stay at home moms. It is a kind of responsibilities and tasks that just never ends. It is relentless and you have to do it again and again. The lack of productivity is the main reason that causes a feeling of sadness, anger and depression in a stay at home moms.
The pressure to create and maintain perfection in all areas of life
This is the second most important factor that is typical to this generation. According to famous author Judith Warner (Author of “Perfect madness: motherhood in the age of anxiety), explains that “the demands placed on mothers in term of level of performance are greater than ever”.
The pressure to have perfect home+ perfect life+ perfect kids is compounded massively and creates an incredible amount of stress on stay at home moms.
Never having enough time for yourself
Third important factor, it is one of the most common scenarios that stay at home moms never get enough time for themselves.
They often had tons of mothering and household responsibilities that keep them occupied all the time. This thing creates the feeling of loneliness and isolation. And in long term, it could lead to depression, anxiety and other mental issues.
Lacking of personal achievement and goal accomplishment
No doubt, we all our kids like crazy and we want to nurture them with uttermost love, care and joy. But during the day to day life, only completing mothering and household responsibilities often causes a sense of exhaustion and frustration.
Also, Lack of creativity and the same sequence of repeated tasks creates a sense of boardam and indifference in everyday life.
It is not unusual that lack of personal achievement and goal accomplishment creates an imbalance to our mental and emotional health.
I also had a similar story like most of the stay at home moms. Because of some personal and mothering responsibilities I had left my job. I want to give my complete attention, love and care to my kids. And I had done this too with complete dedication and motivation.
No doubt, it is one of the most rewarding and beautiful experience of my life. I had a great time while caring, raising and nurturing my girls.
Another side, sometimes I felt that I need more from my life. Sometimes I felt that I am losing my personal identity or doing nothing except finishing routine chores. Sometimes I had felt a strong emotional breakdown too, because of these waves of negative emotions,
Indeed, being a stay at home is quite challenging. It is just as hard as doing any other professional work or completing any professional responsibilities.
And you have to keep yourself motivated every day to do things properly, on time and with love, good mood and positivity.
Here I am sharing 5 easy and effective way that help me a lot to be a happy and productive staying at home mom. Hoping this may help others.
Set a routine and try to stick with it
I know you may have heard the same thing a thousand times before. And I am too putting a strong emphasis on this as a first point.
You know, sometimes when we have to stay at home whole day, it becomes really hard to maintain a schedule or routine. And we may get caught in the rhythm of “having no desire to doing nothing”, or even, “not completing even the routine household chores”,
I am sure most of us had felt the same emotion from time to time.
For avoiding this negative or neutral mood, it is very important to set a schedule or routine for everyone in the house. Finishing all the chores on time, not only give a peace of mind but it helps in being happy and productive as well.
And for doing that you can,
- Pre-plan your week or day with a planner or to do list.
- Prioritise your duties and responsibilities in urgent or not urgent categories for the particular week, at the beginning of the week.
Become an early riser and try to finish routine chores as early as possible
This is the second important thing that helps me a lot to stay happy and productive as a stay at home mom. Most of the moms often complain that they never get enough time to do other things or spending some “Me time”.
I believed it is not as hard as seems.
If we get up little early and finish our routine chores that include shower, loading the dishwasher, or laundry, or fast clean-up. This thing will give a kick-start to your day and you can get enough time to do other productive things and can be the happy and positive stay at home mom.
Teach your kids to do chores and creates a discipline in the house
this is another effective way that can help a lot to moms reduce day to day stress.
Look at these examples.
- My kids do not listen to me
- They never finish their chores on time
- They never put things on place
- They never help me in any household chores (you may include husband too, in this list)
Agree this is one of the most common struggles that we stay at home moms often face.
Indeed, it is really depressing.
This lack of support and lack of discipline in family members often create a sense of frustration and exhaustion in a stay at home moms.
It is very important that every home should have some sort of discipline and finishing chores strategies like we have in any workplace. It is equally important, that family members should follow a routine and discipline. And for doing that.
- Make a chart or planner for kids to complete tasks on time and give them a reward too for completing them.
- Take help of all family members in completing other tasks too.
- Assign some sort of duties and responsibilities to everyone.
- Do not take the overload, learn to say “NO”, when you are sick or over exhausted.
Do not give up on your own dreams or passion
This is another prominent common reason, why moms stay at home often feels sad, depressed or unhappy.
I had heard a lot the same thing from so many stays at home moms (in fact some are my close friends too), “now, the life is only for kids”
“Now, I do not have my own dream, ambition or passion”
I agree, after being a mom and with handling multiple responsibilities it is not easy to follow your own dreams, ambitions or passion”
But, I would say, try to change it with never give up attitude.
If we always keep ourselves engaged in completing only various household or parenting responsibilities than very soon, we get a sense of exhaustion and frustration. In fact, these duties and responsibilities feel like a burden or pressure.
Another side, if we take out some quality time for over selves and follow our own dream and passion, we always feel more energetic and refreshed. This is the basic mantra that will help in keep going with our responsibilities more easily and positively.
It is not mandatory to link up this thought with earning the money or doing a full-time job. It could be much simpler than that, such as
Spend some quality time with yourself by doing the thing which you actually want to do. It is very important to set aside time for yourself. It is a great stress reliever.
Follow your hobby or passion
Nowadays, the internet offers various options for work from home or doing part-time things, with this you can pursue your hobby into your passion and can get a sense of self-satisfaction and accomplishment. This is the key thing that has helped me a lot to stay happy and productive as a stay at home.
Last but not the least
Ask for help
Sometimes being a stay at home mom, we trapped our life inside the home and struggle alone with multiple negative emotions. This is the main reason that many stays at home mom often suffer from depression, anxieties and other psychosomatic disorders.
And if you feeling the same kind of negative emotion with a sense of isolation, do not hesitate to ask for help. Get out from the house, talk to other moms.
- Get some fresh air by either walking in a park with your kids. you may visit nearby library or shopping mall to change the mood and energy.
- Get dress up nicely with makeup, accessories and other things. These are the tiny things that create a major positive impact.
And if you are suffering from major negative emotions, take the help of professional counselling. It is better to express your emotions, rather than suffer from it.
Last but not the least,
“Never compare your life, routine, or achievement with others.
Just focus on your personal journey and try to make it better with best possible efforts.
Being a stay at home mom, this is one of the most common emotions that affect us. We often compare our life with other working moms . And feel ourselves less compliment and efficient. this comparison becomes one of the main reason of unhappiness or negativity”,
Keep remember, each one has their own journey, own up and down and own struggle and own achievements.
Instead, try to enjoy your own journey and do best with whatever you can do”
So these are some points that helped me to stay happy and productive as a stay at home mom”?
What are your thoughts? Please share!
The post is a part of linky party, #MondayMotivation, hosted by Zainab from slimexpectation.com and Neha from Nehatambe.com